Hark! A Vagrant - Oh Hello

older alia: "hey younger self, what are you doing?"

young alia: "making a rock collection. all of these [points to pile of quartz] are opals."

older alia: "wow. those are really pretty! do you like rocks and things?"

young alia: "yep!"

older alia: "cool! you should keep learning about them. they are pretty interesting! other things are neat too, but this is a fun thing to do for a job!" (i would suggest skipping the museum stuff, but it made me some good friends.) "learning math and science are really important. you should skip that crappy high school relationship and do better in school."

young alia: "..." *picks up more rocks*

alia: *becomes a geologist* [so, success, I guess!]

That is almost double the population of my homeskillet town, and we had a president visit us in our high school lunchroom once! So I guess the logical conclusion is that you will have, like, one and a half presidents visit here over tea.

Hmm, the conversation would probably go like this:

LittleGeorge: So why don't you have a suit? Or a game system?

MeNow: Well, suits are far too formal. I'm not quite east coast enough for a suit, but not west coast enough to not wear a tie. Also, I own a DS, and GAMES for systems I don't have sooo..

LittleGeorge: Do you still go biking up crazy trails in the woods?

MeNow: Man, I haven't owned a bike for years, city biking just isn't as cool. But I will be in NYC here for the next two years so maaaybe that'll be cooler.

LittleGeorge: New York?! Are you going to be a ghostbuster?!

MeNow: Ghosts are real little me. Super sorry to let you down on that. But I am working on saving humanity, through research and science and social thought. PLUS My sister knows the publicists of both Stephen Colbert AND Jon Stewart so I'll see their shows all the time!

LittleGeorge: Who the heck are those guys?

MeNow: Well.. hrn, remember George Carlin? How he was awesome in those specials the parents let us watch but really shouldn't have, and how he was still cool in Bill and Ted AND Thomas the Tank Engine. They're like him, only not as awesome.

LittleGeorge: WOW. So they do kids shows too!?

MeNow: Everyone does kids shows now. I don't think there are any real adults left.

LittleGeorge: Man, you're kind of a bummer.

MeNow: Well here's my DS. Entertain yourself with the ChronoTrigger remake that's coming out for it. I'm going continue grinding till I can seamlessly interface with the web.

LittleGeorge: Sweet! Chrono Trigger!

...

I'd imagine itd go something like that anyways.

older me: You'd probably be a lot happier if you learned to jump rope with the other little girls. Seriously, the movers and shakers of the fourth grade are all out there double-dutching.

little me: *turns another page*

Hello, I'm Kylie and I can't draw. No really, I can't.

Younger Kylie: Hello, why am I talking to you over the phone?

Older Kylie: Because, er, what are you now, 9? Well, you're gonna move to Switzerland in two years.

Younger: NO. WAY. Cool! Then we can go skiing all the time and we'll see our Swiss grandma more and speak Swiss German and frolic in the sunshine. What else?

Older: Er... It's not going to be quite that great, actually. Anyway, guess what, I spent this weekend dressed as a celt and eating lots of free food! Also, you're gonna get a job in a bookshop -

Younger: BOOKS!

Older: - and spend waaaay to much money on books you don't have time to read!

Younger: The future sounds good to me!

I wish I'd known I'd get a job in a bookshop when I was older, then I never would have saved for weeks and spent every last cent on books when I needed more important things like, y'know, clothing and shoes.

Little Craig: Dinosaurs rule!

Older Craig: Damn right, they do. Parasauropholus is pretty awesome, huh?

Little Craig: Yeah, but I can't spell it.

Older Craig: Err... yeah, don't worry about that. So, you gonna study these guys when you grow up?

Little Craig: Yeah! I totally want to be a paleontologist!

Older Craig: Well, you'd better practice your math, because getting a degrees in a science-related field requires it for some stupid reason.

Little Craig: Why do I need math to dig in the dirt and look at bones?

Older Craig: Because truly god hates us. But don't worry, you'll totally have a crush on an anthropology student when you get older. Maybe you'll work at a dig site for old dead people?

Little Craig: Beats nothing. :)

No LJ account! D:

Old G: Hey, there.

Little G: ...

Old G: Yeah, I just remembered, you didn't start talking until you were older than this.

Little G: :D *cuts a cartwheel*

Old G: Yeah, enjoy doing that while you can, kid.

We could organize a bunch of people to defriend you, then refriend you again. You could experience breaking the 2500 mark a second time!

older jes: Oh hey there, what are you doing?

younger jes: writingg. I'm going to be an author and make millions of dollars and be really famous and just write books all the time. I will live on Cape Cod and have a yellow house on the ocean and it will be really cool.

older jes: Oh, that's cool, what are you going to write about?

younger jess: detectives! like harriet the spy! Except everyone will love her and not cover her in paint and it will be cool.

older jess: I think you're thinking of the movie harriet the spy, not the book series.

younger jess: Aren't they the same thing?

older jess: Well, no not really. They kind of messed with the plot of that a bit..

younger jess: oh oh oh guess whatt.

older jess: what?

younger jess: I made a goal at my soccer game the other day, I'm really good at soccerr. I think I'm going to be a professional soccer player.

older jess: I thought you just said you were going to be an author?

younger jess: Yes, I'm going to be an author and live on the ocean.

older jess: But you just said you were going to be a soccer player?

younger jess: yes, I'm going to be a world famous soccer player.

older jess:.... *becomes a high school student with a passion for writing... quit soccer in 7th grade after realizing that she sucked*


when I was little I would change my mind many times. Although, I've always wanted to be an author... sometimes when asked I would say something else becuase at that point in time I REALLYYY wanted to be that. I have wanted to be a soccer player, lawyer, singer, actress, model, photographer, artist and many other things. Writing is the only thign consistant. aahahha.

I love your comics and this is the first time I've commented becuase I thought this was really neat. Your history comics are the best! Although, my history teacher did not understand most of them... I really doubted that graduated college. sorry this is really long.

Older me: "(aw fuck i hate kids, no conversation come on dont make eye contact ughhhhhhh)"

Younger me: "(Uh oh a big kid, i dont like talking to new people please dont talk to me please youre kinda scary looking with your huge beard)"

Older me: "...(aw god damnit why did you make eye contact with me, now everything will be akward until i talk to you)"

Younger me: "..."

The older me makes a gesture suggesting a "what's up", the younger me smiles back.

MeNow: Please, please, please, don't sell all those old comics and scifi magazines and books. Just stick 'em in the closet and forget about them.

MeThen: Whatever! I want Mork suspenders and a boombox!

"Hey Younger Self, guess what?"

"What?"

"Where I come from, Super Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog are friends."

"But...but that's impossible."

"They're even in games together."

"I...I..."

"Oh yeah and you write about video games for a living."

"....."

"I dunno officer, I was talking to her and she just done gone 'sploded. I guess that means...Time paradox, oh shi--"

(I can't draw and I can't even try to fake it with any paint programme that comes loaded on an Asus EEE.)

If only I could have made a career of spelling complicated words and throwing cool birthday parties.

With all the advice I'd have to give to a younger self, this would be an epic undertaking for me. Also quite uncomfortable for people reading it, I'd imagine.

Aha! I must do a small strip as you have requested. I even know what I will write.

But alas, I must go see a doctor about things. When I get back (assuming I'm still alive), I'll do it.

I joined the f'list after a link to your LJ was posted by eskemp. It was the Tesla cartoon that sold it for me. :) Thank you for that.

tragic.

Previous incarnations of Blake are and shall always be flawed! My present existence is always the apex of Blake, and previous Selves will acknowledge that. Present-Self has held to a sworn vow* from the beginning, that if Future-Self should meet Past-Self, Future-Self will punch Past-Self in the gut for being lame*! Then, depending on the mutual time-period in which we find ourselves, we will either play "Ninja Mutants vs. GI Joe vs. Evil Transforming Robots" or play Video Games, while Self from the Future advises Past Blake on items such as, but not limited to: GIRLS, CARS, STOCK TIPS, THE INTERNET BUBBLE, THE HOUSING BUBBLE, WHICH SHOWS I SHOULD WATCH, COLLEGE MAJORS, and A FUTURE IN WHICH ROBOTS HAVE DESTROYED CIVILIZATION, LEAVING YOU AS BARBARIAN ROBOT-SLAYING KING.

*In the event that time-travel does not allow for physical contact, a verbal beat-down will be administered.

This has been part 13 of 90 in my series of dealing with time-travel, and event for which I have prepared most of my life.

Not so much funny, but yeah. I was convinced that calligraphy was for tools (aka my dumb older sister), hated teachers (GUESS WHAT I'M GOING TO SCHOOL FOR, DURR HURR), wanted to study WOLVES in ALASKA and also had this problem with this gross boy named Chad who sent me balloons all the time until 7th grade when I realized he was pretty cool and we dated for 2 years. That's quite a bit of change for me...

Younger self [for it is me]: "Do things work out for you?"

Me: "Sort of."

Younger self: "Do I get to bake cakes?"

Me: *chokes back a "The Cake Is A Lie" line, knowing it's decades before it'll become relevant* No, but you know that TV show you like? The one with the spaceship and the alien with the pointy ears?"

Younger self: "Yeah? What about it?"

Me: "You won't believe what they end up doing ... or you, for that matter."

Younger self: "Like?"

Me: "Oh, they develop a whole alien language ... and you get to learn it for yourself."

Younger self: "Oh, wow."

Me: "And you'll learn a whole lot of other fancy languages, too, and have a go on a really fancy machine one day called a computer."

Younger self: "What? Like those big things with all the men in white coats running around it"

Me: "Yup. Only, when you get here, they'll be small enough that you'll have one on your desk. They'll be making them small enough to fit in a satchel, or even stuff into your pocket. Plus, your telephone will be small enough to carry around in your pocket and you'll be able to call anyone whose number you know, in any country. And every piece of equipment you ever use will be able to talk to each other, with every computer hooked up in a great worldwide network. It'll be fantastic."

Younger self *writing*: "Do go on."

Me: "What are you doing?"

Younger self: "Writing out patent application forms. You were saying ...?"

I just added you yesterday! Hooray!

My little self would be like, "big self, how long did it take for you to grow out your hair and stop looking like a boy?" And my big self would be like, "you know what, I don't know, but stop practicing piano on the tabletop, damn."

Older Apey: Hey, Squirt, what's up?

Li'l Apey: I'm reading about MUMMIES!

Older Apey: Oh yeah, I remember that issue of National Geographic. Those crazy Incas.

Li'l Apey: When I get older I'm gonna be an archaeologist! And an international spy!

Older Apey: Uh, hmm, about that...

Li'l Apey: D'ya think I'd get to work with Dr. Bob? He's so cool!

Older Apey: Yeah, y'see the thing about that...

Li'l Apey: I'm going to get a PhD an' go dig stuff up around the world - 'cept maybe not Egypt 'cause it's too hot - and it's gonna ROCK.

Older Apey: *sigh* Yeah, not so much.

Li'l Apey: What do you mean? MUMMIES, old Apey, I'm gonna explore ANCIENT CIVILIZATIONS!

Older Apey: Try "move to a different part of the country in high school, get really depressed, get talked into journalism school, and then move again to get an MA studying modern culture."

Li'l Apey: *crestfallen* No mummies?

Older Apey: Er, no. You do take some classes in the classics as electives in undergrad, though.

Li'l Apey: *glare* You suck.

Older Apey: Hey, you wanna go to the museum?

Li'l Apey: Can I play with your Anubis and Thoth finger puppets?

Older Apey: Knock yourself out.

"So do I grow up to be a writer or cartoonist?"
"No. You're a librarian."
"That sounds boring."
"Not really. Turns out there's a kind of librarian who doesn't work with books and you wear shorts and a t-shirt to work all the time. You work with stuff that's not invented yet."
"What kinda stuff?"
"Computer stuff that makes it so you watch TV and yell at people watching the same show in other states and countries. Oh, you also live far away from here."
"That's cool."

i wrote one and then changed my mind.

Katana: You're going to change your name when you grow up.

Tamara: I'm a bank teller for halloween because we HAVE to dress up and I don't want to.

Katana: When you are a bank teller when you grow up, you're going to be annoyed because of the dress code there, because you'll be a goth, and--

Tamara: What's a goth?

Katana: Uh. We think it's Halloween all the time.

Tamara: Christians don't do Halloween.

Katana: Oh don't worry, you don't believe in that anymore.

Tamara: Aw. I'm going to hell?

Katana: Um. See you in a couple years.